This Scriptural Detail Still Messes with Me
My first blog of 2026
I was given some strange advice when I first started writing books;
“When you’re not writing, read. When you are writing, stop.”
I cleaned that up a bit, but basically, they advised me to do a ton of reading when I wasn’t working on a book. Then, whenever I start to write, I should stop reading.
Essentially, I’ve expanded on this advice in my own life; I’m intentional about seasons of listening and seasons of speaking.
It’s one of the reasons why I can’t stand the current culture where everyone is always speaking all the time. Social media, podcasts, the 1-minute sermon clips, and now Substack have the leaders of God’s people talking every single day. Thats not sustainable.
It’s why I chose not to write until today.
Over the last month, while we’re fasting and prepping ourselves for the new year, I chose to put the pen down.
But now that our fast is over, I’ve picked it back up! And this is what I wanted to write about first.
Rehoboam was 41 (2 Chronicles 12:13).
I’ve always loved the story of Rehoboam, King Solomon’s son and King David’s grandson. He’s the guy who ruined all of their work on his first day on the job.
The story is in 2 Chronicles 10, but we can sum it up real quick;
Rehoboam becomes King
the people ask him to lighten their labors
he goes to the men who used to advise his father
he doesn’t like their advice, so he goes to “the young men who had grown up with him.”
he likes and takes their advice.
the nation splits into 2
So it’s a cautionary tale to the young; be mindful of who you listen to!
The wisdom of those more experienced than us is more valuable than our generation’s current level of understanding. This makes sense.
But here’s the thing: I didn’t realize he was a 40-year-old man. Which means his advisors were in their 40’s as well.
I assumed they were in their late 20’s or early 30s, kind of like running a young adult ministry. I envisioned them as youngsters sitting at the kids’ table, trying to play “adult.” But no, they were in their 40s.
A man’s 40s are their prime of their life. Many of the people we glean from are in their 40s. Most professional athletes retire well before their 40th birthday. We’ve had presidents in their 40s!
But this truth applies even to them; be mindful of who you listen to.
Someone who I’d probably listen to, leaders a decade older than me, should not forget how to receive wisdom from those older than them. They have not graduated from requiring good counsel. They do not know everything.
So how much more should I listen?
How much less do I know?
Rehoboams age proves that we never graduate from listening, and listening to the right people. Sometimes we even believe we’re the right people for others, so we should do more talking than listening.
Today’s world is obsessed with anything other than listening. We’ve got people of all ages teaching: recipes, how to build a business, how to not pay taxes, workouts, gardening stuff, pastoral podcasts, theology debates, etc. They just keep talking and talking and talking and talking.
Which may lead us to believe we’ve become good listeners! We listen to podcasts all day. But it’s seemingly had the opposite effect; we’ve become passive listeners. We listen to so much that we’ve stopped knowing how to listen.
And the talkers talk so much they’ve forgotten how to say anything.
What’s the harvest on that? It feels like one of the more divided times in our history, just like the nation divided under Rehoboam.
I’m 34, and realizing Rehoboam was 41 makes me want to lean into my father/pastor more and more. It makes me want to spend far more time this year listening rather than talking. It makes me want to write about things that are true, not things that make sense to me.
I’m not sure what that realization spurs in you, but I hope we can all spend less time listening to strangers and more time leaning into the advisors worthy of our attention.